This last weekend, I bought my first pair of skinny jeans.  Well, okay, technically, they’re “slim straight” jeans.  But they fit like skinny jeans (in my opinion) until the calves/ankles, where they have a breath of room.  They’re also a really nice, dark wash.  And they don’t make me feel like I’m wearing leggings, which is essential.   My friend said they looked fantastic, so I am going to believe her. (She also said that we’re too old to wear jeans that look like leggings, for which I am eternally thankful.)

I also purchased my first pair of leather boots.  Granted, I bought them online after trying them on in the store so I could use a 20% off coupon code.  So I don’t actually have the boots in my possession yet.  But I think they’re incredibly adorable.  I feel as though they’re casual enough to wear under bootcut jeans or over my one pair of skinny jeans, but nice enough to wear with a skirt or with my sweater dress and leggings.  Now, of course, this could just be my belief that footwear is much more versatile than it may be in reality.  However, I don’t care.

Now, on another topic entirely, my goal this week is to figure out where the door to the exercise room is at my apartment complex.  I’ve really got to start working out, and I think the elliptical or the treadmill will be just the ticket.

Someone asked me today what my dating goals are.  I didn’t have a great answer, but I am pretty recently out.  I think I basically listed every possibility as my goals: dating around, dating for a relationship, etc. I think the problem is that I’m trying to not have dating goals right now.  I’m trying to just see how it goes and play it all by ear.  I want experiences, but not for the sake of having experiences.

I also have been sucked into watching The L Word.  I had seen the first two seasons, but then quit watching because it’s so awful.  But I’ve realized that it’s such a part of the lesbian consciousness, that I just have to see it.  And then I kind of got hooked.  I mean, I’m still in season 4, but I know I’ll be watching the whole thing.  (Thank god for Netflix.)

And for the record, I did not bother to see the Super Blood Moon tonight.  I have better things to do than stand outside in the cold.  Like sleep.  Besides, there will be fantastic pictures online tomorrow, I’m sure.

Weekends are never long enough.  Still on my list of chores to do: laundry, ironing, scrub the tub, vacuum.  But guess how many hours of Netflix I’ve watched already?  Oops.

I have a friend coming over this afternoon–we may take a walk or just stay inside.  It depends on what the weather decides to do.  Tomorrow I have a second date with a woman I met online–we’re going bowling.  I’m sure I will impress her with my ability to get an absurd amount of gutter balls…

I think a trip to Starbucks may be in order when my friend gets here.  Priorities.

FYI: Don’t watch the movie Blue is the Warmest Color.  However, I do recommend the graphic novel Blue is the Warmest Color, which it was (very loosely) based on.  The movie sucks. The book, on the other hand, is heart warming and heart wrenching and delightful.

I’ve finally given up on not shaving my legs and now have beautifully smooth legs again.

It was hard for me to decide to give up on it, because fuck patriarchy.  But in the end, I prefer smooth legs: I am a product of my culture and society, after all.  I am 100% fine with other women not shaving, and I wish I could care less about it so that I would join them long term.  But…  smooth legs!

I also like jumping into things completely, then deciding if I want to stay or not.  I spent an entire summer with unshaved legs.  I feel like I gave it the old college try.  And now that I’m out, and not trying as hard to be undesirable to men, I am more willing to do things like shave my legs because it now has (and perhaps should have always had) nothing to do with men and what they like.  Men are just a moot point.  Which I think is fucking fantastic.

I also took the time to paint my fingernails black yesterday.  I love black fingernails, but rarely do it because painting fingernails is a pain in the ass.  And for all the effort you put forth, it rarely lasts long enough to make it feel worth it.  I also kind of suck at painting my fingernails.  Alas.

It’s Labor Day. That means I have the day off, which is fantastic.  I’m going to a baseball game later today with a friend.  Other than that, it’s 9am, and I’m still in my pajamas, watching Netflix, drinking coffee.  What a good morning.

However, I have been thinking that I really need to get back into an exercise regimen.  It’s been a long time since I did anything active on a regular basis, and I can feel the effects.  Ugh.  Not that I’ve ever been that great at it, but still–something is better than nothing.

The theme song to Cheers is basically the best thing ever.

All the feels, all the time.  I’m getting so much closer to total equilibrium, though.

I got Netflix last weekend, and now I have no intention of ever leaving my apartment.  I also just got 4 DVDs that I’d had on hold from the library (pre-Netflix), so you can be sure that this weekend is booked.

Cameron Esposito is coming to town in October, and I can hardly wait.  I’m going by myself since I don’t know anyone who likes her, and I can’t see the point in bringing anyone who won’t be geeking out with me.  Because I will totally be geeking out.  Her fiance, Rhea Butcher, will be opening for her, so this is definitely a twofer.

Oh, and I got a new haircut last night. My stylist totally had a picture of Hannah Hart that she’d clipped for me. So that is the inspiration.  Right now it’s an intermediary cut since I have to grow some of it out still.  But I love this cut. It’s fantastic.  It’s important to have a haircut that makes you feel good. For reals.

Also: I need some foodspiration.  I have been failing on feeding myself properly for weeks now, and it’s really starting to take its toll.  Send food.  Or inspiration.  Preferably food.

Ugh. Life!  But this morning I’m feeling about 98% better, so that’s something. I took the day off of work to just… not be there.

In other news, on August 4th, I got the best fortune from a fortune cookie ever.  It said: “Remember three months from this date for an exciting event.”  I can’t wait to see what November 4th holds in store. haha

I have a sink full of dishes and no desire to wash them.  This is happening more and more often.

There’s really nothing to report.  Although last night I did have a really interesting dream, both delightful and disturbing.  I’ve been reading Patrick Rothfuss’ Kingkiller Chronicles (I just finished the second book), so I think the dream was taking place in that world, more or less.  I wasn’t an archanist, which was too bad, but my dream girlfriend was–she was also pretty hot, if I do say so myself (good job, imagination).  Unfortunately, we had a mission to kill a demon cat (sad, sad, sad) that had been wreaking havoc.  Like I said, delightful and disturbing.

I’m basically having the worst week ever, emotionally.  I’m not going to go into all the boring details, because who the fuck cares besides me?  But I will tell you about one part of it.

I had applied for a job, a promotion, at my office.  One that I was really excited about.  Today, I rescinded it–this after an official interview and an unofficial interview.  There were only two of us in the running–myself and a co-worker.  He has been with the organization for 10 years.  Ten fucking years.  And everyone loves him.  He’s not like me, who gets a very mixed bag.

That said, I had two things that worried me excessively.  One, that the office would hold it against me if I got the position over him.  To be honest, I would do a better job at the actual tasks.  But he will be friendlier and will get along with the other managers and directors better, not to mention everyone else.  They will like him better because they do already.  Plus, people will feel as though it’s owed him because he’s been there so long.  Two, through the questions and conversation of the interview, it just came to rest quite heavily on my shoulders that I have no business working a job that works with people.  I suck at working with people.  I’m not likeable or relate-able. I need to find a job that deals less and less with people and just keeps me at my desk with numbers or facts or whatever.

So I took myself out of the running, took the decision away from my supervisor, and essentially handed him the job on a silver platter.

Then I came home and cried.

Fuck life this week.

Tomorrow night I’m going to see The Gift. I’m kind of nervous because I’m a wimp when it comes to movies, but it’s not like I’m watching it alone.  So it will be fine, right?  A week ago, I saw Paper Towns–a good movie, but not one I’d see again.

Patrick Rothfuss’ second book in The Kingkiller Chronicles, The Wise Man’s Fear, finally came in at the library for me (I had been on the hold list for over a month).  It’s fantastic!  I don’t know if any of you read the first one, The Name of the Wind, but it was engrossing.  I couldn’t even put it down.  So far, this one is living up to expectations.  It’s nice to have something new and fresh to read.

I’m about 2/3 of the way through the second season of Orange is the New Black.  I got an hdmi cord, so I get to watch it on my tv, which is nice.  It’s a pretty good show, I think, although kind of stressful.  (And again, you know me…)

Other than that, if anyone has any recommendations… let me know.


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