I’m really just going to have all the feels, all the time.  I’m mood swinging with the best of them, on a roller coaster ride of emotions.

If only I were used to feeling, then I think I could manage better.  But it’s still such a surprise that I can feel like this.  [How long will that take to be normal?]

Most of the things I’m learning I like.  But I have learned that I am apparently a needy person, which I do not like.  I don’t need a lot if I can get something–just throw me a bone once in a while.  But how to communicate that to a person that you’re not in a relationship with, that you’re not even sure how long you’ll be seeing?

I’m seeing her tonight, I think.  I’m inclined to continue seeing her, despite whatever the timeline ends up being.  I’m still not entirely certain what her inclination is.  However, my best friend agrees with me–perhaps because when our situations were reversed, I advised the same.  So either it is good advice or my friend is merely paying me back.

I’ve also realized that I don’t want to do this casual dating thing I’ve been doing.  Oh, maybe I do/did in general, but I’m taken enough with this woman to want to see only her.  My timing is terrible.  I want to jump in, both feet first, and I’m not sure I get that option anymore.

I’m like some terribly angsty teenager.  It’s pathetic.

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