Any of you who know me know that I am no friend of change.  I will accept it if I have to, but usually with much kicking and screaming along the way.  Even self-chosen change is hard for me.

So it should not surprise me that even little, inconsequential changes feel bigger than they really are.

For example, we got new upstairs neighbors in my four-plex.  There’s two of them, and they each have a car (as opposed to the other three of us who are single and have one car).  We have six total parking spots for our four apartments.  Up until now, this was perfect, with two extra spots for guests.

But one of my neighbors has been having her cousin stay with her for over a month.  That means that we now have no extra spots.  And not just that, but the new people don’t seem to realize yet that my upstairs neighbor and I park in the same spots every day.  They are more or less assigned, even if not officially.

So here is the stressor: not only do I have nowhere for guests to park, but my spot could be taken at any moment.  I might come home to no spot.

I’ve asked my landlord to assign parking, at least for four dedicated spots, so that this never happens.  He seemed amenable.  (Let’s hope that means it will happen sooner than later.)

And yes, I know I’m kind of crazy.

Well, I didn’t think the last guy would turn out like he did.

As it is, he’s a fake entirely.

So after spending two weeks talking on the phone for hours every day, when he never showed up for our date, I oscillated between being pissed and being worried. The summary is that the morning after, a friend and I spent some time google stalking him extensively.  We found a real person–facebook, twitter, pinterest–connected to the pictures–and oddly some of the attributes.  We’re not sure if the real person was who was faking me out or if someone else had merely stolen his pictures.  (His social media is very public, so way too easy to steal.)

I can tell you I went from disappointed to indignant and angry pretty damn fast.

But don’t you worry.  I am getting right back on the horse with a coffee date this afternoon.

(My new strategy is to meet first, talk later.)

Although if this guy doesn’t show, I might have to start questioning the universe’s deep seated desire to keep me single.

Quick Update:  I will comfort myself with the fact that even Elizabeth Bennett was taken in by that charlatan, George Wickham.

Alright, so I’m back in the world of internet dating.  Because I’m a sucker.  And also for my friends’ enjoyment.  I thought I should share my most recent, very terrible, first date story.

Two weekends ago, I went on a first date with a guy who seemed okay from our conversations.  Oh, how wrong I was.  I’m not sure when I should have walked away.  Was it when he said he didn’t like coffee?  Or when he said he watched the Harry Potter movies, but had no interest in reading the books?  (He’s not really a reader, apparently.)  Or when he insisted his cat would only eat cheap, supermarket cat food and violently hated all other animals?  When he said he usually just drank soda (no water for him) and that pop tarts were a regular part of his diet?  But you know what the clincher really was?  When he said, and I quote, “I can’t imagine a life without high fructose corn syrup.”  Thank goodness that by then I had finished my coffee and could skedaddle with poor excuses.

Who says that?!  Even if you have terrible nutrition, which was evident by his wane, sickly complexion, you should not be proud of it.

Oh the wide and “wonderful” world of online dating.

Stay tuned for more great stories.

SophieSophie has this piece of paper that she loves.  Okay, so whenever her piece has been ripped to shreds, I cut her a new piece from a roll of shipping paper I stow away.  But only because she loves it so much.  She hides in it, runs down the hallway and jumps/skids on top of it, basically spends a lot of time with this piece of paper.

This last weekend, while playing in her paper, she ran head first into the wall.  I’m not going to lie, I laughed.  Poor kitty.

ShelbyAnd to be fair to both cats, here’s a pic of Shelby.  This has been one of her new chilling spots.  I have no idea why this is so comfortable to her, but I’ve noticed she sits like this on warmer days.

Speaking of warmer weather, I think it is finally cooling off!  Maybe.  I hope.

I’ve been going to a United Methodist church lately.  And overall, it has been a really good experience.  They’re liturgical and socially liberal.  And the pastor (probably both) are feminists.  Er, the reverend?  I’m not good at their lingo, yet.

Life is speeding along, largely without me it seems.  I am not sure how just yesterday it was August 1st, and now the month is almost over.  Additionally, I would like to petition that we get more rain.  Just sayin’.  [Should I put that apostrophe inside or outside the punctuation?  Generally I put them outside, but what with the placement, I felt it more appropriate to be in.  Anyone know?]

As you know, I am mostly quite pleased with my living situation (being alone, that is).  However, every so often, I go through periods of loneliness.  I suppose this is normal.  And I think it is also connected to being less satisfied with my current situation (work, apartment, that sort of thing).  Sometimes I just plain envy those who have someone else around, be it a roommate or a significant other.  (Do not get me wrong: I do not want a roommate for anything.)  That is mostly when I have to, yet again, wash dishes or cook or some other chore that I would otherwise split with another person.  Or when I think it would be nice to have someone around with whom to talk something over.  I don’t know.  Maybe I just need a better network of friends.

Food-wise, I’ve been making some new and tasty dishes: spicy lentil sloppy joes, chickpea Mediterranean stew, farmer’s lunch sandwich, to name a few.  Tomorrow I am going to finally try black bean and sweet potato burritos.  I am hoping it is everything I have imagined (and more).

I guess that’s it for now.

I really have nothing new to say, hence the dearth of posts.

I’ve been fighting fleas for around two months.  Yes, my indoor cats got fleas.  So a lot of my free time has been filled with combing the cats, vacuuming, rubbing diatomaceous earth into the carpet, and doing extra laundry.  But the last two times I combed the cats, I didn’t find any fleas on them; so I am hopeful that with a bit more dedication, I will be flea-free.

Job-wise, I am actively looking still, of course.  Sometimes I despair that I will only ever be an administrative assistant. Perhaps someday I could hope for Office Manager, if I got some bookkeeping skills.  Anyway, job hunting is horrible. 

That’s it for now.

I spent this morning being productive: making tzatziki and chapati dough. I think I was a little too heavy handed with the water in the chapati, but it should be fine. I’m not convinced you’re supposed to let it sit in the fridge all day before you cook it, but I have such a hard time actually making things after work.  This way it will be ready to cook up on the stove top. (In this heat, I am avoiding the oven like the plague.)

In other notes, not about food, I am feuding with our mailman at work.  Okay, my office is with me in the feud, but I am the one doing the work.  I used to feel friendly toward unions, but now I’m starting to hate them.  Because the USPS union is the reason he’s still on our route.  I have written so many letters, made so many phone calls.  I have sent copies of my correspondence to the Office of the Inspector General, the Consumers Affair Office for our post office, and the General Postmaster (twice for him).  Every time the postman gets talked to, he ups his game.  But not as in does a better job: no, thinks of new ways to mess with us and our mail.  I am going crazy. 

A quote from Thomas Merton:
“My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not actually mean that I am doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you.”

I have long loved that quote. And I think it explains how I reconcile some of my social views with my theological ones.

Anyway, today I tried out a new church. A United Methodist church, actually. I was sort of wary, probably because many years ago I would have never gone to a UM church. But I went, and it was the perfect blend of liturgy and relaxed presentation. Their associate reverend is a woman. And they’re okay with people’s sexual orientation and gender identity being non-mainstream. [Side note: I am oddly leery of churches who agree with my social inclinations. I think I worry that they will then disregard their bibles dreadfully. But this does not seem to be the case. Yet.] The music was enjoyable, the people were welcoming. It was a positive experience, which is becoming rare for me at church.

I am going to go back next week. And probably the week after that, and after that. I may have found my place. Until I move, that is.

I am hoping to move back north, closer to my family and friends (the ones in this state, anyway). Of course, it may take me some time (forever) to find a job, so… We’ll see.

So I’ve been doing some thinking about church.

I’ve decided that I have to put forth a real effort to find one, and to actively engage with my faith.  The first part will mean that I try a new church every weekend (unless honest-to-goodness circumstances prevail).  The second part will mean that I get back into a habit of reading my bible and praying.  Even when I don’t feel like it.  (Which is always, lately.)

I just don’t believe that faith is something you do when you feel like it or when the notion strikes.  It’s a real, every day thing.  And I believe it wholeheartedly.  So why am I so unwilling?

I would still maintain that I have good reasons to sort of check-out.  But even if the reasons are good, they’re not good enough.  Right?  This doesn’t mean that I throw myself into a church with blinders on (heavens, no), but I have to try to get back to a healthy place, at least.

It sounds like so much work.  I remember when these things weren’t work, but delight.  I want them to be delight again.

While I know that I solely am responsible for my actions, I still hate that it has been my fellow (so-called) Christians that have brought me to this place.

Here’s to hoping.

The other day I bought some gummy bears.  I rarely do this because although I l.o.v.e. gummy bears, I do not love artificial food coloring.  But I found a pack that was colored using vegetable and fruit derivatives.  Then I drove to the library for our all-staff meeting and left them in my car.  On a hot day.  By the time I got back to my car, they had melted in their package.  (I put them in the refrigerator, and now I have a gummy sheet.)

I cannot tell you how disappointed I was.

But they still taste great.


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